Donald Thompson: Why your pride is slowing your career advancement

Too many professionals are told to “fake it 'til you make it,” but pretending you have everything figured out won't accelerate your career. It does the opposite.

Early in my career, I couldn’t afford the luxury of an ego.

That wasn’t a philosophical stance — it was a practical reality. I didn’t have a technical background, and I didn’t come into business with a resume that checked traditional boxes. What I did have was ambition, work ethic and a willingness to learn in public. To move forward, I had to drop what I call the ego backpack — the invisible weight people carry when they feel pressure to prove they already have all the answers.

The hidden cost of “having all the answers”

One of the most common growth blockers I see — across industries and career stages — is the belief that asking questions signals weakness. People hedge their curiosity. They soften questions. They avoid admitting what they don’t know, because they’re worried about how it looks.

That instinct is driven by ego and fear.

Ego whispers that you should already understand this. That asking for help will expose your ignorance; that confidence means certainty. The truth is, ego cuts you off from the very information you need to grow. When leaders stop asking questions, they stop learning. When they stop learning, they stop adapting. And in today’s environment, that’s a serious liability.

Why dropping ego accelerated my career

When I worked with Grant Williard at I-Cubed, I was strong in sales — but I was stepping into a world defined by technical expertise, engineers, and complex systems. I didn’t pretend to be something I wasn’t. I asked a lot of questions: What is this? Why does it matter? What should I read? Who should I learn from?

That growth mindset mattered. When Grant began looking for someone to take over leadership of the company, my lack of technical credentials didn’t disqualify me. Instead, my willingness to learn made the difference.

Admitting what I didn’t know became an asset, because it helped me quickly fill in the gaps of my knowledge. My professional trajectory moved fast, not because I had all the answers, but because I was willing to learn faster than others. It felt less like climbing stairs and more like climbing a rope. You rise quickly when you’re not weighed down by ego.

Rapid learning requires humility

Many people create obstacles to their own growth because they fear how it makes them look. They don’t ask questions because they don’t want to appear uninformed, or they think it will damage their credibility. They’d rather protect their image than build true capability.

Other leaders are impatient. They don’t study deeply. They don’t listen long enough. They skim instead of learning. Their ego convinces them they already know enough.

But if you want to learn something new — truly learn it — you have to ask unfiltered questions. You have to let experts teach you. You have to do the work to build real understanding.

As successful as I am today, my mindset hasn’t changed. I still ask questions. I still assume I can learn from anyone in the room. I don’t need to be the smartest person there. In fact, believing you are is one of the fastest ways to fall behind.

That mindset is what allowed me to move across industries — technology, marketing, DEI (diversity, equity and inclusion) consulting, leadership coaching, and executive branding — without losing momentum. You can’t pivot if your ego insists you already know everything.

Confidence is not ego

Many leaders get tripped up because they confuse ego with confidence.

Confidence isn’t pretending to know it all. Confidence is understanding your strengths so clearly that other people’s expertise doesn’t threaten you. I know I’ll never be the writer my creative partner Bob Batchelor is — and I don’t need to be.

My network and my curiosity give me insights into market trends and the topics influencing business leaders. Bob understands how to amplify my voice, so it reaches a wider audience. The work is stronger because our talents are different and complementary.

Ego says, I need to protect how I look. Confidence says, I’m secure enough to learn.

Ego avoids appearing foolish. Confidence doesn’t care, as long as progress is made.

That difference matters more as you gain seniority. The higher you rise, the less people will challenge you. Without self-awareness, leaders begin to mistake silence for agreement and deference for alignment.

What the research tells us about self-awareness

Ego and lack of self-awareness hold leaders back. If they’re afraid to appear ignorant or not open to feedback, they can’t learn and grow.

Research published in the Harvard Business Review reveals that many leaders believe they are self-aware, yet fewer than 15% possess this critical skill. As leaders gain power and experience, they often become more confident in their own judgment — and less likely to question their assumptions or invite alternative opinions.

That’s dangerous.

Research shows that self-awareness is the strongest predictor of overall success for leaders, accounting for roughly 30% of the difference between high-performing and average leaders. Leaders who know their strengths and limitations are also more open to feedback, more adaptable, and better equipped to change their behavior when conditions demand it.

Feedback is the antidote to ego

If ego is the weight, feedback is the release valve.

No one reaches their potential without understanding what’s working, what’s not, and how they’re being experienced by others. Self-aware leaders actively seek that information. They don’t wait for annual reviews. They ask in real time.

· What should I do differently?

· What perspective am I missing?

· What new skills can help me become more effective?

They also build networks that tell them the truth — mentors, peers, coaches, colleagues who aren’t impressed by titles. Honest feedback isn’t always comfortable, but it’s essential if you want to keep growing.

Confidence includes knowing where you need to improve and taking responsibility for closing those gaps. That’s how leaders increase their value over time — not by defending what they already know, but by expanding what they’re capable of doing.

Leave the ego backpack behind

Ego doesn’t just slow individual growth. It limits teams. It weakens decision-making. It blocks learning in environments that demand constant adaptation.

The leaders who continue to grow are the ones who stay curious, remain self-aware, and refuse to let ego dictate their behavior. They understand that asking questions is not a weakness. It’s a strategy.

If you want to accelerate your career and climb to new professional heights, lighten the load. Drop the ego backpack. Let self-awareness fuel your capability — and your success will follow.

To cultivate the self-awareness that accelerates growth, leaders need clear insight and actionable feedback. LeaderView helps leadership teams identify strengths, surface blind spots, and build the core competencies required to navigate change with confidence, including self-awareness and a growth mindset. When leaders see themselves clearly, they lead more effectively.

About the Author

Donald Thompson is an award-winning CEO and multi-exit entrepreneur, honored as EY Entrepreneur Of The Year®, named to Forbes Next 1000, and a 3x Inc. 5000 Chief Executive. Currently the Managing Director of the Center for Organizational Effectiveness at Workplace Options, Thompson is a sought-after speaker on innovation, culture and growth. His books include Underestimated: A CEO’s Unlikely Path to Success, now available as an audiobook; The Inclusive Leadership Handbook: Balancing People and Performance for Sustainable Growth; and The Employee Engagement Handbook, coming in February 2026. He hosts the globally recognized podcast “High Octane Leadership,” and has published widely on leadership and the executive mindset. Follow Thompson on LinkedIn or contact him at info@donaldthompson.com for executive coaching and speaking engagements.